The ‘Yeah, But You…’ Syndrome.
When you hear or read someone criticising you, or your sex, or your group etc, it’s a rare person who can exhibit the emotional intelligence not to fall into this bad habit.  Rather than addressing what has actually been said, most people find themselves immediately going on the defensive and saying," Yeah but you… !" It’s so much easier to go into blame and to essentially change the subject… rather than actually addressing what the original person said.  This is a classic (mostly unconscious) pattern with people in friendships and relationships, and it means that things rarely get sorted out - which of course, means the slow death of the relationship.  Much better to stay on point and address what the first person actually said. Find a way to truly understand them, before making a stand for yourself.  Be patient, your turn can always come later. That’s what it means to be an adult.  Man Box Masculinity
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January 2025
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